From the late, great John Pinnete (to the tune of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”)
Somewhere over the buffet:
Food piled high.
There’s a meal I must get to,
Stop me and you will die.Somewhere over the buffet:
Watch me fly.
Eating up all of the profits,
Making the owner cry.Someday I’ll have my own buffet
Where no one can tell me to stop eating.
With prime rib, pork chops, pizza, ham –
A gastronomic wonderland!I’ll be at every seating!
If scrawny, skinny men can fly
Over the buffet,
Why oh why can’t I?